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Wednesday, 01 October 2014

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Fancy being a job decoder?

Postman. Train driver. Miner.

There used to be something reassuringly straightforward about job titles. There would be a job, and the name of that job gave a pretty big clue as to what the incumbent was supposed to do.

Things have changed. For evidence, we need only consider that the University of Cumbria Students’ Union is currently advertising for a representation facilitator.

That’s right – a representation facilitator. Two words, 10 syllables, no idea what it means.

Reading the advert would be easier with an Enigma decoding machine.

Let’s see if the job description makes things any clearer.

Duties will include “to facilitate the union’s representation portfolio, to promote and administrate the union’s democratic systems, processes and activities”.

Nope, still no idea.

 

The post is part-time, which should leave plenty of time for scratching your head and wondering what on earth you are supposed to be doing.

Continuing on job adverts, The Edinburgh Woollen Mill is looking for a ‘Fit model – size 12’.

Again, the job title may be a little confusing. The model does not necessarily need to be physically attractive. In this context the word ‘fit’ has a different meaning, as the ad makes clear: “We are looking for a size 12 lady to help us fit our garments.”

Reiver is not sure what kind of contortions the model will be expected to perform in these garments. But applicants are informed that “The successful candidate will need to be flexible.”

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