It is hard to believe that so long has passed since Danny Livesey decided a Carlisle United play-off semi-final with the coolest of penalties on one of Brunton Park's wildest nights. Then 20, now 32, Livesey has lived a football life in those 12 years but that evening in 2005 keeps coming back.

"When I go up to Carlisle to see my friends, and we go out, people still talk about that night, that penalty," he says.

As the Blues face a second-leg epic at Exeter tonight, with the possibility of extra-time and spot-kicks to gain a place at Wembley, it is not difficult to recall the club's only previous triumph in this sort of decider.

It was against Aldershot, when United were striving for promotion from the Conference, and it produced a night of blistering drama, including a last-minute goal, two pitch invasions and a shoot-out as turbulent as the club has ever known.

At the heart of events was Livesey, a defender who would go on to play 333 times for the Blues but then, as a rookie signed from Bolton by manager Paul Simpson, had little experience of the kind of knife-edge situation Carlisle found themselves in on May 6.

"It had come on the back of quite a bad season for me," says Livesey. "I was absolutely stinking for my first 10 games or so and I was taking a fair bit of abuse. There was the old line on the internet that said I was the worst player in Carlisle's history, stuff like that.

"By that night, thankfully, I'd started to find a bit of form, even though I missed the first leg after getting sent off at Barnet for calling the ref a cheat. We were 1-0 down but I scored early in the second game to make it 1-1, and then Ceebs [Chris Billy] put us ahead. Up to then it was going great. But then they scored right at the end and it went to penalties."

The shoot-out began dismally for Carlisle, as Brendan McGill and Glenn Murray had weak efforts saved. But Matty Glennon, in United's goal, then produced three heroic saves to spin it around. His third, in sudden-death, sparked a pitch invasion, yet many of the fans spilling onto the grass had miscounted.

United still had to score to secure their place in the final. It meant Livesey had an extended wait to take the defining kick. "I went seventh," he now laughs. "Beforehand I'd been looking at Ceebs thinking, are you gonna go before me, or what, senior pro? In the end I kind of bullied him to go before me. But then I had to step up, because there weren't too many behind me.

"Matty pulled off some unbelievable saves. When he saved their sudden death one, I remember the fans all running on and thinking, 'What's going on here?' I saw people screaming, trying to get them off the pitch. And they never quite made it off. If you look at the video, they're crowded around the outside. It would have been such an anti-climax if I'd missed. I think I would have got lynched."

The wait to step forward must have felt eternal to a young player with destiny in his hands. Livesey, though, believes the premature invasion actually helped him. "I was only young, and I had a bit of jelly legs when I prepared to walk up. But then that invasion took my mind off it. It kind of got the adrenaline back. Rather than being nervous, I was wondering what was going on. Maybe it made me re-focus.

"I didn't realise it at the time, but Dennis Booth [United's assistant manager] said to Simon Grand that the Aldershot keeper had gone the same way for every penalty. Grandy knows my secret, that I always go one way, and luckily it was the opposite way to the way the keeper had been diving. So Grandy knew it was already in the bag."

Livesey stroked it into the bottom right corner as goalkeeper Nikki Bull indeed dived the other way. Brunton Park erupted again. "I know this sounds silly, but I knew I wasn't going to miss," the defender says. "I'd been feeling good building up to that night, and I was starting to find out that I was gonna have a career in the game. Let's be honest, after my first 10 games I could have been out of a job by now. But things then started falling into place.

"I managed to keep calm. It's difficult, keeping your emotions in check. But all the messing around between the penalties kind of saved me a bit."

Livesey leapt into Glennon's arms, and United progressed to a final at Stoke against Stevenage won by Peter Murphy's header. Remarkably, the hero of the hour had also, at 20, taken his last penalty. "First and last," Livesey says.

Seriously, none since? "No. I think I've been eighth or ninth in line in any others. In fact I don't think Dennis Booth would ever let me take another in my life. No matter where I am, he'll come and stop me.

"Anyway, I don't see the point. I can only miss now. There'll be some young kid waiting in a shoot-out and wondering, is this ****bag gonna take one? I'll be that guy who sits there quiet and goes after the keeper..."

These amused reflections from United's old No5 remind us that anyone could be the hero tonight. Someone - ideally in a blue shirt - will make a name for themselves at St James' Park. Livesey, who also played in the 2008 League One play-off defeat to Leeds, thinks his old club are entitled to be confident of their chances after Sunday's 3-3 draw at Brunton Park.

"They can probably reflect on the game and think they're in a better situation than Exeter," he says. "Pulling it back from two goals behind might deflate them [Exeter] a bit, whereas Carlisle will be feeling a lot more positive.

"I know it's at their place, but to lose two goals can still have an effect on the team. I think the Carlisle lads will be looking forward to it. They'll be going there feeling they have nothing to lose. They've just got to play it as a one-off game. Against Aldershot we had to go in ready to chase it, but this one is honours-even. You go in and play your normal game. They won there last week, so I think they'll be fairly confident. And they're probably right to be fairly confident."

With so much at stake, one imagines tonight's duel will be mentally taxing for all involved. Livesey, though, isn't sure. "During the game, you just get wrapped up in it. You don't think too far ahead, thinking, 'we could win this' or 'we could lose this'. You're just playing the game as you have all your life.

"The only time it does play on you, and it's the most obvious one, is when you are waiting for your penalty, because you've got time to think about missing. I know you've got time to think about scoring too, but the negatives often overtake you and get into your head."

An explosion of "positives" would occur should United get through tonight. There would be memorable scenes in Devon, as there were at United's home 12 years ago. "It was brilliant - exactly what you get into football for," says Livesey, now with Salford City after being released by Barrow.

"It was a time when we were starting a journey together, people were backing Fred [Story, then owner], and the fans were on our side.

"There seems to have been a bit of infighting with fans and board more recently. From the outside looking in, people have maybe got a bit disillusioned with what's gone on, and it's a shame. I hope the good times return, because the fans deserve it.

"For me, it's a great honour to be part of this Carlisle United history. People need to see what a great club it is. Everyone who plays for it normally ends up with such fond memories, and they are the memories that stay with you.

"Just talking about it makes you smile. That's how football should be."